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第21章

At half after five I went below to set the cabin table, but hardly knew what I did, for my eyes and brain were filled with the vision of a man, white-faced and trembling, comically like a bug, clinging to the thrashing gaff.At six o'clock, when I served supper, going on deck to get the food from the galley, I saw Harrison, still in the same position.The conversation at the table was of other things.Nobody seemed interested in the wantonly imperilled life.But making an extra trip to the galley a little later, I was gladdened by the sight of Harrison staggering weakly from the rigging to the forecastle scuttle.He had finally summoned the courage to descend.

Before closing this incident, I must give a scrap of conversation Ihad with Wolf Larsen in the cabin, while I was washing the dishes.

"You were looking squeamish this afternoon," he began."What was the matter?"I could see that he knew what had made me possibly as sick as Harrison, that he was trying to draw me, and I answered, "It was because of the brutal treatment of that boy."He gave a short laugh."Like seasickness, I suppose.Some men are subject to it, and others are not.""Not so," I objected.

"Just so," he went on."The earth is as full of brutality as the sea is full of motion.And some men are made sick by the one, and some by the other.That's the only reason.""But you, who make a mock of human life, don't you place any value upon it whatever?" I demanded.

"Value? What value?" He looked at me, and though his eyes were steady and motionless, there seemed a cynical smile in them."What kind of value?

How do you measure it? Who values it?"

"I do," I made answer.

"Then what is it worth to you? Another man's life, I mean.Come, now, what is it worth?"The value of life? How could I put a tangible value upon it? Somehow, I, who have always had expression, lacked expression when with Wolf Larsen.

I have since determined that a part of it was due to the man's personality, but that the greater part was due to his totally different outlook.Unlike other materialists I had met and with whom had something in common to start on, I had nothing in common with him.Perhaps, also, it was the elemental simplicity of his mind that baffled me.He drove so directly to the core of the matter, divesting a question always of all superfluous details, and with such an air of finality, that I seemed to find myself struggling in deep water with no footing under me.Value of life? How could I answer the question on the spur of the moment? The sacredness of life I had accepted as axiomatic.That it was intrinsically valuable was a truism I had never questioned.But when he challenged the truism I was speechless.

"We were talking about this yesterday," he said."I held that life was a ferment, a yeasty something which devoured life that it might live, and that living was merely successful piggishness.Why, if there is anything in supply and demand, life is the cheapest thing in the world.There is only so much water, so much earth, so much air; but the life that is demanding to be born is limitless.Nature is a spendthrift.Look at the fish and their millions of eggs.For that matter, look at you and me.In our loins are the possibilities of millions of lives.Could we but find time and opportunity and utilize the last bit and every bit of the unborn life that is in us, we could become the fathers of nations and populate continents.

Life? Bah! It has no value.Of cheap things it is the cheapest.Everywhere it goes begging.Nature spills it out with a lavish hand.Where there is room for one life, she sows a thousand lives, and it's life eats life till the strongest and most piggish life is left.""You have read Darwin," I said."But you read him misunderstandingly when you conclude that the struggle for existence sanctions your wanton destruction of life."He shrugged his shoulders."You know you only mean that in relation to human life, for of the flesh and the fowl and the fish you destroy as much as I or any other man.And human life is in no wise different, though you feel it is and think that you reason why it is.Why should I be parsimonious with this life which is cheap and without value? There are more sailors than there are ships on the sea for them, more workers than there are factories or machines for them.Why, you who live on the land know that you house your poor people in the slums of cities and loose famine and pestilence upon them, and that there still remain more poor people, dying for want of a crust of bread and a bit of meat, (which is life destroyed), than you know what to do with.Have you ever seen the London dockers fighting like wild beasts for a chance to work?"He started for the companion stairs, but turned his head for a final word."Do you know the only value life has is what life puts upon itself?

And it is of course overestimated, since it is of necessity prejudiced in its own favor.Take that man I had aloft.He held on as if he were a precious thing, a treasure beyond diamonds or rubies.To you? No.To me?

Not at all.To himself? Yes.But I do not accept his estimate.He sadly overrates himself.There is plenty more life demanding to be born.Had he fallen and dripped his brains upon the deck like honey from the comb, there would have been no loss to the world.He was worth nothing to the world.The supply is too large.To himself only was he of value, and to show how fictitious even this value was, being dead he is unconscious that he has lost himself.He alone rated himself beyond diamonds and rubies.

Diamonds and rubies are gone, spread out on the deck to be washed away by a bucket of sea-water, and he does not even know that the diamonds and rubies are gone.He does not lose anything, for with the loss of himself he loses the knowledge of loss.Don't you see? And what have you to say?""That you are at least consistent," was all I could say, and went on washing the dishes.

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