``It is too dark for you to see this,'' he began, in a strained voice, ``so I will translate it to you.It is an attack on Madame Alvarez and myself.They put them up during the ball, when they knew my men would be at the Palace.I have had them scouring the streets for the last two hours tearing them down, but they are all over the place, in the cafe's and clubs.They have done what they were meant to do.''
Clay took another cigar from his pocket and rolled it between his lips.``What does it say?'' he asked.
``It goes over the old ground first.It says Alvarez has given the richest birthright of his country to aliens--that means the mines and Langham--and has put an alien in command of the army--that is meant for me.I've no more to do with the army than you have--I only wish I had! And then it says that the boundary aggressions of Ecuador and Venezuela have not been resented in consequence.It asks what can be expected of a President who is as blind to the dishonor of his country as he is to the dishonor of his own home?''
Clay muttered under his breath, ``Well, go on.Is it explicit?
More explicit than that?''
``Yes,'' said Stuart, grimly.``I can't repeat it.It is quite clear what they mean.''
``Have you got any of them?'' Clay asked.Can you fix it on some one that you can fight?''
``Mendoza did it, of course,'' Stuart answered, ``but we cannot prove it.And if we could, we are not strong enough to take him.
He has the city full of his men now, and the troops are pouring in every hour.''
``Well, Alvarez can stop that, can't he?''
``They are coming in for the annual review.He can't show the people that he is afraid of his own army.''
``What are you going to do?''
``What am I going to do?'' Stuart repeated, dully.``That is what I want you to tell me.There is nothing I can do now.I've brought trouble and insult on people who have been kinder to me than my own blood have been.Who took me in when I was naked and clothed me, when I hadn't a friend or a sixpence to my name.You remember--I came here from that row in Colombia with my wound, and I was down with the fever when they found me, and Alvarez gave me the appointment.And this is how I reward them.If Istay I do more harm.If I go away I leave them surrounded by enemies, and not enemies who fight fair, but damned thieves and scoundrels, who stab at women and who fight in the dark.Iwouldn't have had it happen, old man, for my right arm!
They--they have been so kind to me, and I have been so happy here--and now!'' The boy bowed his face in his hands and sat breathing brokenly while Clay turned his unlit cigar between his teeth and peered at him curiously through the darkness.``Now Ihave made them both unhappy, and they hate me, and I hate myself, and I have brought nothing but trouble to every one.First Imade my own people miserable, and now I make my best friends miserable, and I had better be dead.I wish I were dead.I wish I had never been born.''
Clay laid his hand on the other's bowed shoulder and shook him gently.``Don't talk like that,'' he said; ``it does no good.
Why do you hate yourself?''
``What?'' asked Stuart, wearily, without looking up.``What did you say?''
``You said you had made them hate you, and you added that you hated yourself.Well, I can see why they naturally would be angry for the time, at least.But why do you hate yourself?
Have you reason to?''
``I don't understand,'' said Stuart.
