登陆注册
19848400000157

第157章

But being anxious and sorrowful about the same thing makes people quicker than anything, I think. She's like a mother to Mary in her ways; and he bears a good character, as far as I could learn just in that hurry. We're drawing near home, and I've not said my say, Margaret. I want you to look after mother a bit. She'll not like my going, and I've got to break it to her yet. If she takes it very badly, I'll come back to-morrow night; but if she's not against it very much, I mean to stay till it's settled about Mary, one way or the other. Will, you know, will be there, Margaret, to help a bit in doing for mother." Will's being there made the only objection Margaret saw to this plan. She disliked the idea of seeming to throw herself in his way, and yet she did not like to say anything of this feeling to Jem, who had all along seemed perfectly unconscious of any love-affair, besides his own, in progress. So Margaret gave a reluctant consent. "If you can just step up to our house to-night, Jem, I'll put up a few things as may be useful to Mary, and then you can say when you'll likely be back. If you come home to-morrow night, and Will's there, perhaps I need not step up?" "Yes, Margaret, do! I shan't leave easy unless you go some time in the day to see mother. I'll come to-night, though; and now good-bye. Stay I do you think you could just coax poor Will to walk a bit home with you, that I might speak to mother by myself?" No! that Margaret could not do. That was expecting too great a sacrifice of bashful feeling. But the object was accomplished by Will's going up-stairs immediately on their return to the house, to indulge his mournful thoughts alone. As soon as Jem and his mother were left by themselves, he began on the subject uppermost in his mind. "Mother!" She put her handkerchief from her eyes, and turned quickly round, so as to face him where he stood, thinking what best to say. The little action annoyed him, and he rushed at once into the subject. "Mother! I am going back to Liverpool to-morrow morning to see how Mary Barton is." "And what's Mary Barton to thee, that thou shouldst be running after her in that-a-way?" "If she lives, she shall be my wedded wife. If she dies--mother, I can't speak of what I shall feel if she dies." His voice was choked in his throat. For an instant his mother was interested by his words; and then came back the old jealousy of being supplanted in the affections of that son, who had been, as it were, newly born to her, by the escape he had so lately experienced from danger. So she hardened her heart against entertaining any feeling of sympathy; and turned away from the face, which recalled the earnest look of his childhood, when he had come to her in some trouble, sure of help and comfort. And coldly she spoke, in those tones which Jem knew and dreaded, even before the meaning they expressed was fully shaped. "Thou'rt old enough to please thysel. Old mothers are cast aside, and what they've borne forgotten as soon as a pretty face comes across. I might have thought of that last Tuesday, when I felt as if thou wert all my own, and the judge were some wild animal trying to rend thee from me. I spoke up for thee then, but it's all forgotten now, I suppose. "Mother! you know all this while, you know I can never forget any kindness you've ever done for me; and they've been many. Why should you think I've only room for one love in my heart? I can love you as dearly as ever, and Mary too, as much as man ever loved woman." He waited a reply. None was vouchsafed. "Mother, answer me!" said he, at last. "What mun I answer? You asked me no question." "Well! I ask you this now. To-morrow morning I go to Liverpool to see her who is as my wife. Dear mother! will you bless me on my errand? If it pleaseGod she recovers, will you take her to you as you would a daughter?" She could neither refuse nor assent. "Why need you go?" said she querulously, at getting in some mischief oranother again. Can't you stop at home quiet with me?" Jem got up, and walked about the room in despairing impatience. She would not understand his feelings. At last he stop d right before the place where she was sitting, wit an air of injured meekness on her face. "Mother! I often think what a good man father was! I've often heard you tell of your courting days; and of the accident that befell you, and how ill you were. How long is it ago?" "Near upon five-and-twenty years," said she, with a sigh. "You little thought when you were so ill you should live to have such a fine strapping son as I am, did you now?" She smiled a little, and looked up at him, which was just what he wanted. "Thou'rt not so fine a man as thy father was, by a deal;" said she, looking at him with much fondness, notwithstanding her depreciatory words. He took another turn or two up and down the room. He wanted to bend the subject round to his own case. "Those were happy days when father was alive!" "You may say so, lad! Such days as will never come again to me, at any rate." She sighed sorrow-fully. "Mother!" said he, at last, stopping short, and taking her hand in his with tender affection, "you'd like me to be as happy a man as my father was before me, would not you? You'd like me to have some one to make me as happy as you made father? Now, would not you, dear mother?" "I did not make him as happy as I might ha' done, murmured she, in a low, sad voice of self-reproach. "Th' accident gave a jar to my temper it's never got the better of; and now he's gone, where he can never know how I grieve for having frabbed him as. I did." "Nay, mother, we don't know that!" said Jem, with gentle soothing. "Any how, you and father got along with as few rubs as most people. But for his sake, dear mother, don't say me nay, now that I come to you to ask your blessing before setting out to see her, who is to be my wife, if ever woman is; for his sake, if not for mine, love her who I shall bring home to be to me all you were to him and, mother! I do not ask for a truer or a tenderer heart than yours is, in the long run." The hard look left her face; though her eyes were still averted from Jem's gaze, it was more because they were brimming over with tears, called forth by his words, than because any angry feeling yet remained. And when his manly voice died away in low pleadings, she lifted up her hands, and bent down her son's head below the level of her own; and then she solemnly uttered a blessing. "God bless thee, Jem, my own dear lad. And may He bless Mary Barton for thy sake." Jem's heart leapt up, and from this time hope took the place of fear in his anticipations with regard to Mary. "Mother! you show your own true self to Mary, and she'll love you as dearly as I do." So with some few smiles, and some few tears, and much earnest talking, the evening wore away. "I must be off to see Margaret. Why, it's near ten o'clock! Could you have thought it? Now don't you stop up for me, mother. You and Will go to bed, for you've both need of it. I shall be home in an hour." Margaret had felt the evening long and lonely; and was all but giving up the thoughts of Jem's coming that night, when she heard his step at the door. He told her of his progress with his mother; he told her his hopes, and was silent on the subject of his fears. "To think how sorrow and joy are mixed up together. You'll date your start in life as Mary's acknowledged lover from poor Alice Wilson's burial day.

同类推荐
热门推荐
  • 藏族传统宗教(卷十)

    藏族传统宗教(卷十)

    藏族是中华民族大家庭中的一员。藏族的聚居地以青藏高原为主,分布于我国西藏自治区、四川、青海、甘肃和云南等省。另外,尼泊尔、巴基斯坦、印度和不丹等国境内也有藏族人居住。藏族也是居住地海拔最高,距离太阳最近的民族。藏族有自己的语言文字,文献典籍的种类之繁,数量之多,内容之丰富,在我国各民族中仅次于汉族,位居第二。公元22世纪中叶西藏正式纳入中国版图后,藏民族成为中华民族大家庭的一个成员,与各兄弟民族生死相依,荣辱与共,共同创造了中华民族辉煌的历史。
  • 魔物娘图册

    魔物娘图册

    啪。从天而降的本子落在地上,整齐的合着,就像是在等待吴越的注意一样。“这是什么?”吴越茫然地看去,几步走了过去弯腰捡了起来。当看到本子的封面吴越茫然地嘀咕:“魔物娘图册?什么东西?”
  • 爱了,散了

    爱了,散了

    如果,日复一日,他忙碌的工作而忘记了为你过生日;如果,年复一年,他偶尔疏忽了你的哀愁寂寞;如果,事情复杂,他冲动的处理伤害了你的感情,如果的如果,爱情犯了错,请你不要冲动的说分手,请你不要全都是指责,请你给爱一个机会,请你为你们的未来营造一个温馨港湾!
  • 福尔摩沙③相思饭团

    福尔摩沙③相思饭团

    "冤家路窄!纪书眉作梦也没想到,这辈子还会再遇上张彻一,才刚回台湾,她就被那高大的男人逮个正着,眼前的他,远比当年更俊帅黝黑,也更暴躁而不可理喻,那双锐利的眸子总蕴着熊熊怒火,灼得她头皮发麻,响彻云霄的咆哮怒吼,更是轰得她双耳发疼,曾经迷倒无数男人的惊人美貌,这会儿竟也不管用了,她沮丧得想丢下这笔大生意,脚底抹油的开溜唉啊,不都说大人不计“小人”过吗?他为啥偏偏对当年那桩“恶作剧”念念不忘,不但当着左邻右舍的面绑架她,强掳进荒山野岭里,还对她这儿摸摸,那儿亲亲的,说什么要她尝尝“成人式”的复仇手段……"
  • 我的萌战

    我的萌战

    “因为年轻所犯下的错……”老爸这么表示之后,突然间就多了个能干的妹妹,然后各式各样的妹子就接踵而至了。元气的、三无的、傲娇的……到底谁才是萌王,我一个人说了算。----新书《妾乃漫画家》,欢迎围观!
  • 护花神偷

    护花神偷

    原国际大盗萧震,放弃了身份后回到了Z国开始当一个小小的白领,却是在一次意外之中撞坏了美女总经理的车子被迫签约‘钱债肉偿’,进入到了以制造销售女性化妆品,美女如云的公司打工还钱,并与诸多的美女结下了不解之缘,而就在萧震混迹在众多美女之间的时候,一只来历不凡的小猫‘同行’,更是捣乱添乱似的,把这一切弄的更加的复杂……
  • 风云大宋

    风云大宋

    秦越穿越了,来到北宋元佑四年的杭州,一个距离靖康之耻仅剩三十八年的时代。这是一个最好的时代,既富庶又文灿。苏东坡大江东去,李清照细柳黄昏,四学士齐名天下,米狂草一字万金。一句话,实在太好了。然而这又是一个最坏的时代,既积弱又纷乱。北辽西夏年年岁币仍不免年年内侵,新旧党争此时你谪岭南彼日我亦贬岭南。金虏铁蹄渐闻踢踏,江湖群豪即将啸林。同样也是一句话:好日子快到头了。在这个最好也是最坏的时代里,我们的主角成为一名大宋最底层的读书人。他将做什么,又将改变什么……市井风情,明月黄昏;佳人舞袖,朝堂纷纷;金戈铁马,寸土万金,尽在《风云大宋》。
  • 倾世兵团

    倾世兵团

    一个空怀大志的少年,受尽官兵欺压。一把王者之剑改变了他的命运,招兵买马,聚贤纳才,绝世妖孽尽皆追随左右。他们强大,他们冷血,他们忠诚,他们残忍!一支足以让世人恐惧的兵团就此现世。千年兵团被兵团屠灭,后人皆称这支可怕的兵团为--死神兵团!
  • 大慈恩寺三藏法师传

    大慈恩寺三藏法师传

    本书为公版书,为不受著作权法限制的作家、艺术家及其它人士发布的作品,供广大读者阅读交流。
  • 千万别捡镜子

    千万别捡镜子

    千万别捡镜子,这是我的忠告,因为你丢不掉它,因为它会让你见到太多你不想见到的,因为它会支离你的魂魄,让你剩下的魂魄像没有拼列好的拼图,松散陈列,只等待那些阴魄游魂最后的致命一击……