登陆注册
9337900000009

第9章 段落写作(The Paragraph)(3)

5. It is easy to find an apartment in Los Angeles. Actually, it is very convenient for people to live in a city if it is easy to find an apartment there.(yes)

6. There are also crimes and gangs in Los Angeles. This is the negative aspect of Los Angeles. (no)

7. You have to own a car. It is not really an important factor for the topic sentence. Usually, if you have own a car in a city, it may imply the inconvenience of that city. (no)

8. Los Angeles has easy access to Mexico and Latin America. It is very good for people to stay in Los Angeles which shows that it is a nice city to live. (yes)

9. You can choose from many universities and colleges. That shows city"s education level. (yes)

10.The 1984 Olympics were held there. It is not a really important factor to the topic sentence. (no)

可见2、6、7、10 内容可以删去,因为它们要么和主题句不一致,要么是主题句的不利条件。故1、3、4、5、8、9观点保留为写作的内容:

1. nice climate

2. beaches are close

3. diverse multicultural population

4. easy to find an apartment

5. easy access to Mexico and Latin America

6. many colleges and universities to choose from

五、撰写段落提纲(Arranging Ideas in a Plan)

写作内容选定后,把被选的内容写成提纲并充实具体细节。

Topic sentence: Los Angeles is a pleasant place to live

I. Great climate

A. always sunny

B. seldom rains

II. Convenient living condition

A. close to beaches

B. easy access to Mexico and Latin America

C. easy to find an apartment

III. Diverse multicultural population

A. people from all over the world

B. Many ethics restaurant

IV. Many colleges and universities to choose from

A. private colleges

B. community colleges

C. state colleges

Concluding sentence: Los Angeles is a city with a lot to offer, and it is a nice place to live.

六、撰写和修改段落(Writing and Revising the Paragraph)

提纲写好后,下一步就是初稿的撰写。对作者来说务必牢记,初稿只是草稿决非最后的稿子,作者应该依据提纲认真修改和充实。仍然以Topic sentence: Los Angeles is a pleasant place to live为例,根据提纲我们可试写如下:

Los Angeles is a pleasant place to live. The climate is really great. It is always sunny and seldom rains. In addition, living there is very convenient. The beaches are close and it has easy access to Mexico and Latin America. Another great thing about the city is its diverse multicultural population. People from all over the world, including many Latin American and Asian countries live in Los Angeles. Therefore, you can find many ethic restaurants there. In Los Angeles, there are also many colleges and universities raging from state colleges to private ones. There are also some community colleges, too. In brief Los Angeles is a city with a lot to offer, and it is a nice place to live.

当把文章初稿完成后,应该反复阅读并带着问题去修改完善。可以依据下列问题去发现错误并加以修改。这样,不仅能提高作品质量,长期坚持还能养成好的写作习惯。

1. Does it have a clear, complete and limited topic sentence?

2. Do the supporting sentences fully explain and develop the topic sentence?

3. Are the sentences are varied enough to avoid boredom?

4. Are the words clear, concerted, and vivid?

5. Are there any grammar, spelling, and punctuation error?

6. Are you satisfied that this is your best job you can do?

(第二节)段落内部基本结构

一、基本布局

段落是一组和同一主题关系密切的句子集合,段落大多包括三类句子: 主题句、扩展句和结尾句,其布局对初学写作的人来说可以遵循下图:

Topic sentence Supporting sentence 1Supporting sentence 2Supporting sentence 3Concluding sentence e.g. There are three reasons why John is not going to university. Firstly, his family is quite poor, and his four young brothers and sisters are still at school, he feels that he should help his family financially as soon as possible. Secondly, if he went to university, his mother would be let alone to look after the young children. Finally, he has been offered a good job with excellent chances of promotion. Consequently, although he wants to go to university very much, John is going to take the job instead!

From Paragraph Writing, by Frank Chaplen

Qs:

1. What is the topic sentence?

2. How many supporting sentences are there?

3. Is there a concluding sentence? And where?

二、主题句(Topic Sentence)

主题句的写作要注意两个基本要求:第一是要包含主导思想(the controlling idea),第二是要做到概括和具体的统一。例如,我们不能说:“We had a pleasant summer vacation but summer vacation always seems short.”。画线部分不统一。

在具体的写作中,最容易出现的现象就是主题句过于概括的现象。请看下面的病例:

I want to talk about my father. He is strict with his children, especially me. He won"t let me out of the house unless I"ve done all my homework. He is a tall and rather skinny man. Some people say he is goodlooking. He has a nice streak of gray in his hair. He laughs a lot and enjoys life. My father is interesting.

三、扩展句(Developing Sentences)

从段落的推展过程说,第一个步骤是写主题句,第二个步骤将是写扩展句。例如,你要陈述你选择某院校的理由,第一步,写出主题句:There are two main reasons why I have decided to attend Bingston University next year.第二步,以数个理由推展你的主题:

示范段落

①There are two main reasons why I have decided to attend Bingston University next year.②First of all, there is the question of money:Bingston"s tuition is reasonable and I don"t even have to pay it all at once.③This is very important, since my father is not a rich man.④With Bingston"s “deferred payment plan,” my father will be able to pay my tuition without too much difficulty.⑤The second reason is the fine education which I feed will receive there in agriculture,my chosen field.⑥It is a well-known fact that Bingston hires only the finest professors in its Agriculture Department.⑦Moreover,the university requires all agricultural students to get practical experience by working on farms in the area while they are still going to school.

分析,细节: two main reasons:

理由1:financial consideration②

a.reasonable tuition③

b.deferred payment plan④

理由2:quality of education⑤

a.fine teachers③

b.practical experience⑦

在两个主要理由之下,作者用更小的细节支持它们。由此可见,段落的推展依赖于支持主题句的细节(details)。推展段落的方法很多。通常每个段落以一种方法为“支配方法”(the dominant method),必要时,可运用其他一种或数种方法作为“辅助方法”(the supporting method)。上面的示范段落使用因果法(cause-and-effect)作为支配方法,分类法(division and classification)作为辅助方法。作者还运用了“重要性排列顺序”(the order of importance)作为安排细节、组织段落的手段。我们将在以下各单元逐个讨论这些方法。

扩展句(supporting sentence),就段落内部句子关系,扩展句和主题句之间至少要注意以下两点:第一,意义的相关性(unity);第二,逻辑的一致性(coherence)。务必注意下列病例现象:

1.跑题

同类推荐
  • 格列佛游记(语文新课标课外读物)

    格列佛游记(语文新课标课外读物)

    现代中、小学生不能只局限于校园和课本,应该广开视野,广长见识,广泛了解博大的世界和社会,不断增加丰富的现代社会知识和世界信息,才有所精神准备,才能迅速地长大,将来才能够自由地翱翔于世界蓝天。否则,我们将永远是妈妈怀抱中的乖宝宝,将永远是温室里面的豆芽菜,那么,我们将怎样走向社会、走向世界呢?
  • 往事随想(最受学生喜爱的哲理美文)

    往事随想(最受学生喜爱的哲理美文)

    “故乡的歌是一支清远的笛,总在有月亮的晚上响起。”当我们抛开一切生活中的琐事和纷扰,面对自己,面对头顶那一弯月亮时,往事便涌上心头。往事如歌,因为它留在你的心里了,虽然它已过去很久了。那些留下来的,必定让你感怀不已。将随想的往事诉诸笔端,定然有它的动人之处。
  • 未来在磨砺中生辉(培养学生心灵成长的经典故事)

    未来在磨砺中生辉(培养学生心灵成长的经典故事)

    在这套丛书里,我们针对青少年的心理特点,专门选择了一些特殊的故事,分别对他们在这一时期将会遭遇的情感问题、生活问题、学习问题、交友问题以及各种心理健康问题,从心理学的角度进行剖析和讲解,并提出了解决问题的方法和措施,以供同学们参考借鉴。
  • 林肯传(语文新课标课外读物)

    林肯传(语文新课标课外读物)

    由于许多世界文学名著卷帙浩繁,而广大中、小学生时间又有限,我们便在参考和借鉴以前译本许多优点和长处的基础上,在忠实原著的基础上进行了高度浓缩,保持了原著的梗概和精华,使之便于我们全面而轻松地阅读。这套课外读物还收编了大家喜闻乐见的广博知识,把阅读名著与掌握知识结合起来,扩大阅读的深度和范围,这正是设计本套读物的最大特色。因此,本套课外读物有着极强的广泛性、知识性、阅读性、趣味性和基础性,是广大中小学生阅读和收藏的最佳版本。
  • 教你学歇后语(上)

    教你学歇后语(上)

    语言文字的简称就是语文。语文是人文社会科学的一门重要学科,是人们相互交流思想的工具。它既是语言文字规范的实用工具,又是文化艺术,同时也是用来积累和开拓精神财富的一门学问。
热门推荐
  • 巫妖王异界纵横

    巫妖王异界纵横

    一个年轻人自杀后穿越到了异界,成为炎黄大国中赫赫有名的叶家唯一继承人,文不成,武不就的他被人称之为‘废物’。一次意外进入自己的脑域空间拥有了魔兽争霸里剑圣的职业技能,却也启始了同样封印在脑域中沉睡的巫妖王之怒。看他如何面对脑域中巫妖王及手下茫茫望不及边际的亡灵军团,纵横异界走出属于自己的至强之道!!觉得本书不错的朋友,恳请收藏下。稳定更新,放心阅读!
  • 解读青少年心理文丛:青少年应该具备的处事能力

    解读青少年心理文丛:青少年应该具备的处事能力

    《解读青少年心理文丛:青少年应该具备处事能力》针对青少年朋友当中存在的厌学、耐挫力低、不适应集体生活、处事能力不足等方面的问题,提供合理的解决方案,帮助青少年朋友走出困惑,身心得到良好发展。
  • 一场风花雪月的往事

    一场风花雪月的往事

    现实百态,对生活的事事的评论和感悟,和生活笑料。
  • 整合:让一切为我所用

    整合:让一切为我所用

    资源的整合到底有多重要?古人带兵打仗,讲究的是天时、地利、人和,三者缺一不可,这就是资源有效整合的一个典范。我们熟知的古代以少胜多的战事,大多数都可从中分析出之所以如此结局最深刻的原因。现在的商场就如战场。我们周围可以看到这样一些事情:有些老板很忙,忙到坐下来抽根烟喝口水的时间都快没了,对于这样的人我们总是很敬佩,亲力亲为嘛,可是公司的效益却没有上去,反而有所下降;有些老板却很闲,经?常约朋友去打打高尔夫啊、骑骑马啊什么的,公司的效益却很让人眼红。为什么呢?我觉得很重要的一个原?因,就在于其是否重视并进行了有效的资源整合。
  • 仙界第一高手

    仙界第一高手

    草根少年马烈小时候学书不成,去学武,又不成。被父亲歧视,负气离家出走。无意中得到了仙界第一第二高手的内丹。这有希望让他脱离苦海,成为仙界第一高手。机遇和个人努力都很重要。从来就没有人能随随便便成功草根的崛起更是要经历重重波折磨难。让我们随他一路奋战在仙界看他怎样从一个命如蝼蚁的凡人成为仙界第一高手!(朋友们,欢迎来到仙界第一高手这本书里。请大家帮忙点击加入书架和推荐,小虫在这里谢谢各位了!:))
  • 给我你的Angel翅膀

    给我你的Angel翅膀

    每个女孩都是无泪的Angel,当她遇上自己喜欢的男孩便就有了泪。
  • 旧事了

    旧事了

    温润淡漠的女子,远离虚荣与名利,孤注一掷地深陷于爱的泥沼,却为爱情友情所背叛。
  • 傲武仙尊

    傲武仙尊

    天元大陆,以武为尊。神修、妖修、异修,三修逆天,主宰万界。神界少主姜龙,因神族覆灭,转世重生到一名落魄的外门弟子身上,因身怀神界无上至宝战龙鼎,聚三修于一身,傲世群雄。且看他如何一路高歌,踏破九天,重登神界,报仇雪恨,成就一代傲武仙尊。
  • 萝莉变身记

    萝莉变身记

    你知道什么是学霸的境界吗?学霸的境界,是可以放弃名校的录取通知书,拿着三流大学得毕业证,依旧潇洒的走进名企的大门。咳咳,你们可能觉得她很好运,但她说的最多的话就是,晦气,晦气。她,几乎每天都是从噩梦中惊醒,再从噩梦里沉睡。她的上司是个不折不扣的变态恶魔总裁,当她突然开始有些离不开他的刁难,她惊呼:哇!我是不是疯了!她的人生里,无时不刻的在出现着变故,无论亲情,友情,爱情。当自己得知这家公司选择自己得目的,她在现实里崩溃,却又从现实里重生。当一场商战袭来,商业界开始为她而变得混乱。她,究竟是谁?
  • 倾世废材五小姐

    倾世废材五小姐

    她是凡是接过的任务无一失败,被誉为奇迹杀手。可却没想,有朝一日,被自己爱的男人亲手送入黄泉。老天垂怜,让她穿越成碧落大陆丞相府的废材五小姐,天生经脉堵塞,嚣张跋扈,本是丞相府尊贵的嫡小姐,却是人人茶余饭后的笑谈,却又有着与侯府天才小世子的婚约,(某女在心里无限咆哮,垂怜个毛线,庶妹嚣张,庶姐横行,还不如死了算了,但转至一想,既然活过来了,只求遇上一助人为乐滴红领巾。)结果,红领巾没遇到,倒是招来一朵朵烂桃花──尊贵神王,情愿为她赴以红尘;至霸魔皇,情愿为她一扫六界……。金麟岂是池中物,一遇风云便化龙。某女却大方挥挥手,行了,想娶我的人多了,慢慢排队吧!.